Birthday blessings

My son has a birthday today. This is a son who's had some major difficulties with his emotions. We've been through hell and back with him, and are never quite sure if we'll be reentering hell at any moment. I've invited his father to eat birthday dinner with us. We have the tradition of saying "eyes open" grace before meals, so we're holding hands and looking at each other. X says as he looks at E, "Thank you God for E living to be 16, and hope he lives another year." I'm thinking what a terrible blessing! So I chime in, "Yea God for E! Thanks for bringing him into our lives. Help him to have a really happy year." And my youngest says, "And help him to not get shot." "What did you say that for?" "Because Dad said he was glad he lived this long and hopes he lives another year." "would you please stop talking about death when we're celebrating E's life?" E responds, "Mom, you're being ridiculous."

What the h#** kind of father says something like that to his son??? I come from the faith tradition that the father is supposed to offer a blessing to the sons. It's supposed to be a "blessing!" Not a stupid, "so glad you survived!" And you know if his tone had actually sounded like he was glad, it might have been a celebratory thing to say. No... Even then, it would be inappropriate at the dinner table with a friend and the whole family!

I am amazed and angry that he would be so thoughtlessly mean. And to think that my son accuses me of being ridiculous! God save us all!