Maundy Thursday

Holy Week has always been the most spiritually significant week of the year for me. Each Holy Week I walk with Jesus emotionally and spiritually. It's hard to finish plans for Easter until at least Saturday night since I am still reliving the crucifixion until Easter. In fact, it's been my tradition without even realizing it that I am in the crucifixion until Saturday afternoon when I force myself to color Easter eggs with the kids, slowly dragging myself to Easter with each egg dropped in a cup of color. By the time we have coated each egg with some artistic or non-artistic flare, I am ready to think about Easter again. (I say again because I of course have been part of planning Easter for months ahead of time.)

This year's Holy Week is different. I approach it from a different perspective, a lost belief system. I'm okay with that this year. Everything else is different, so I can't expect Holy Week to be the same. And yet, I'm drawn into the events of the week. Especially today. I imagine Jesus sitting at the table with his friends for the last time. Hanging out with those he loved, in all their idiosyncrasies... fighting for the best seat at the table... reciting the passover liturgy... Judas sharing the meal with Jesus, and Jesus allowing him there. "You prepare a table before me, in the presence of my enemies... " (Psalm 23) I wonder who said the child's part of the liturgy? Passover is a family meal... Jesus and his friends were family. No matter what people say, I'm willing to bet his mother was there.

Washing feet.... there's a part of the liturgy where everyone washes their hands. It's at that point that we think Jesus would have washed the disciples' feet. The lowly servant's job, Jesus did. He humbled himself. He didn't just anyone. He sat at their feet and cleaned their filth with his love. He even washed Judas' feet. While he was washing Judas' feet, what was he thinking? Was he wishing that Judas would change his mind? What was Judas thinking?It would be nice to have record of their inner conversations. I can't imagine being as humble as Jesus, especially toward Judas. It takes more than a lifetime to learn to love like that! As the rabbi, Jesus would have led the liturgy, taken the role of the "father." At one point in the service, bread is broken and then served and wine is later poured and served. We do these out of context most of the time, we lose track that they are part of a great feast. We eat a crumb of bread and a sip of juice and call that communion. It's not. It's a crumb and a sip. I wish we would have communion with a meal. Eat with gusto! Share our lives, our love and our food. That would be truer to the meaning of communion! Sometimes we do that. Sometimes we get it right.


Maundy Thursday, the day, according to the Gospel of John, Jesus gave the "great commandment." The truth is that the writer of John doesn't really give us the whole "great commandment." The other gospels tell us to love God, love others as much as ourselves. John just says to love each other. I think that's where the church veers off track in only wanting to love the people who are, "one of us." Even though this day is named for the giving of the commandment, I find this gospel's version of the commandment lacking in depth.

Tonight we worshipped. As we move from celebrating the great commandment and communion to the crucifixion, once again I dare to walk along the path with Jesus, both spiritually and emotionally.